Show Don't Tell

Show don’t tell is a phrase familiar to all writers. What does this mean? Telling happens when authors simply tell readers what’s happening instead of inviting them in to experience the story by showing them what happens through the characters’ thoughts, feelings and actions.

Why does that matter?

Because we often tell ourselves all kinds of crap. Sometimes it’s true, often it’s not. Lots and lots of words flow through our brains at any given moment and it often feels out of our control. One way to slow things down and break us free from the swarm of thoughts invading our brains at any given moment in time is to intentionally show ourselves what we’re actually experiencing. We can even choose the experience.

I suggest choosing love.

To show yourself some love, pick an action—something small and simple you can do that you can enjoy in its own right. Then infuse the action with some positive emotions (gratitude is always a great go-to). If thoughts arise (often taking the form of advising you of all the other things you should or could be doing) just send them away and return to the experience of showing yourself kindness and love. Make a cup of delicious tea or coffee and allow yourself to truly be in the moment enjoying your brew. Take a hot bath. Cozy up with a book and some uninterrupted reading time. Do whatever feels like love to you.

Showing yourself a little love makes it harder for those negative thoughts to persist. The world didn’t end because you stepped out of its orbit for ten minutes. You feel better. Then invite your thoughts back into the game. What else might be fun? When can you show yourself some love again? If your thoughts can behave, they can stay. If they start to try and control the reality show that resembles your life again, then they’ll have to have another time out.

Showing invites you to experience your life in the moment it’s actually happening instead of thinking about the past or wondering about the future. Life happens here, now. Not sure? Don’t take my word for it—I’m just telling you. Go show yourself.